Monday 21 December 2015

Consent required (a.k.a. "Look but don't touch")

I've lost count of how many times I have read an interview of a well-known rider and how they got started, and at some point it involves illicit rides on a pony in a field. No one ever seem to comment on this or tell it from the side of the owner of that illicitly-used pony.
Just recently I've been thinking about the whole "stealing a ride" phenomena from their point of view.
Over the summer, a person who had very rarely helped groom ponies some years before turned up on my father's doorstep asking if they could take a non-UK visitor of theirs to "look at" the ponies. No problem - though my father was in the middle of something so didn't go down to the field with them.
Not long after, it was feed time for the ponies anyway, so he went down to the field. At which point he discovered that not only had these folk got a head collar out of the store to catch the pony (Rosie) who lives in the school, but the young visitor was *sitting* on the pony (without a hat). And they proceeded to ask if they could ride her around the school ! The answer, of course, was no.
I only found out about this when I got home from work. I have problems with it on so many levels(*), but they all lead back to one major issue - they did this without any kind of consent from us. They had permission to look. Not to catch, sit, ride, or anything else.
[*Did they not even stop to think why that pony was living in the sand arena rather than out in the field with the others ? Did they rummage around until they found a head collar which they just assumed would do ? The girl had no hat. The person "in charge" is in a profession which regularly has to fill out risk assessments - did it not even occur to her to think about what might go wrong ? and so on and so forth]
Don't get me wrong, I can still remember the pre-horse owning hope that someone would let me sit on their pony. And not only were there some very kind people who said yes, but I have paid that forward and let Rosie be ridden by a number of other people. So to repeat - this is not about protecting Rosie or being territorial, it is about consent.
Why is it that people think it is ok to wander into a field and get on a pony they don't own, without the permission of the owner/keeper ?
We don't think it is ok to walk into someone else's home, snap a lead on their dog and take it for a walk ?
Or pick up their keys and take their car for a drive ?
Or use their kitchen to cook a meal ? 
Or take their children off without a word ?
Why any ponies fair game when so no one would consider "borrowing" these other things ?
There are so many practical reasons why the borrowing without permission is wrong, including safety. But what makes it unacceptable rather than merely foolish and unsafe is that these horses are our equine partners; we spend time building trust and partnership with them. 
Would you wander into Carl Hester's yard and just hop on to Valegro ? Is my pony any less precious to me ?
What gives them the *right* to use something that belongs to someone else without that person's consent ? Why do these people think they have a "right" to take with no associated responsibility ?

No comments:

Post a Comment